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March 14th, 2005

home again @ 06:46 am

i drove up to the hermitage
via Harbin Hot Springs
saturday morning
with Frank Martin and Paul Brown
( ednixon and bigredpaul )
kinda morning
it's hard to escape the vortex
and i eventually felt anxiety near panic trying to get us out of there
and we made it...

dropped off my info with my friend john... so he could see TuxedoMoon... which i bought a ticket for
but can't see
as i won't be down there for it.

rainbow grocery..

up through the napa valley
lengua burrito... probably last for a while
at La Luna grocery in Rutherford

Harbin
hmmmm
the broken rib i got from wrestling with my teacher when i was a kid came back like a splinter of pain
Paul was massaging me
i was swimming
i was screaming underwater and shaking around
it came out
i flopped around like a fish
i was so high

the house was sleepy when i got here
the boys crashed out

i finished making my absinth blend
and slept round two..

the next morning was slow
made Kitchari in the pressure cooker
and then we headed back to the springs...

there was an uncommonly beautiful man
frank said "Stunning"
i watched him move everywhere
when he got into the water
i was fixated on every part of him

we looked and glanced and smiled
i started working on Paul
and he came over to stand by Frank
i got the impression he wanted him
but then i massaged Frank
and then i massage the beautiful man
and we hugged and talked
for nearly two hours.

Ok.

i said
"i treat harbin like the garden of eden: here i have no judgement or critism.. i let that go and just enjoy the beauty... everyone is beautiful here... i'm not like this everywhere..."

i lay naked in the sun
i did the hot and cold work
i was so high...

and came home to meet Leo
we talked and hugged and hugged and talked
he made dinner
of fussili pasta. Portobello tomato sauce from a jar... and peas from a can...
 
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