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March 9th, 2005

donuts and denile @ 06:48 pm

Current Music: I Don't Know What I Can Save You From-Kings Of Convenience-Quiet Is The New Loud


i mailed off the package
i waited for the bus
talked to a nice man
who loved my beard
and talked about the days when everyone wore beards like that
and how beards aren't all that great when they go silver

so he says
but i love them anyway

i jumped off the buss quickly anyway
at delores park
and hiked up the hill...

the friend i was going to visit was at Clipper Street
which is between 25th and 26th
so i hauled up the hill
huffing and puffing
and at the crest
i got to see the beauty of twin peaks, the Noe valley, the bay...
it's a beautiful day
sweaty, hot
crazy!

i sat and talked with my friend for a while
and he's one of the ones who love it here

when i left there
i took pictures of the beautiful view
and it struck me that i really DID love this city
i mean
as i've always said
it's the most beautiful city in america

maybe i'm just pissy that it rejected me?

i felt ugly.

i bought some donuts.
a few days ago
i got some donuts with Paul

they make me feel sick
don't make that mistake again

i waited for the train
feeling heavy and ill
and ugly

i don't like making anyone feel bad
don't like pissing people off
nor being an ugly judge-monster
that wasn't my intention at all

but i guess now isn't the time for here
it's so pretty
it would have been nice to live here for the summer
walk up these hills
sweating and tired
legs burning
but Butt so beautiful from walking so much
would have been beautiful
but now i'm going to live somewhere else
and it will be more beautiful because of Love
and love makes everything more beautiful
and i can always visit this place...

which i will always be a tourist to anyway
anyway
a tourist

the guy at the bus stop told me i needed to just write how i write
"no use editing the voice of god"
after he explained that even Mozart didn't Compose his own pieces
they were just dictated and he just wrote them down
it flows through

i'm not such a great mouth-piece of god yet
but i'm working on singing clearer...

now i'm off to see the Kings of Convenience at the Cafe Du Norde... Yeah!
 
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From:chefxh
Date:March 10th, 2005 03:46 am (UTC)
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ooo, the cafe du nord, one of the best Basque menus anywhere.

The city is heartbreakingly beautiful from a distance (like when the 37 Corbett turns onto Market) but apart from the views it's a collection of insular social groups held together by a taut web of mutual hatred and distrust.

Up close it is NOT pretty.
From:ikahana
Date:March 10th, 2005 04:49 am (UTC)

Relatin'

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Before living there I thought it was the greatest city and nothing could ever compare. After we moved there, I developed the most extreme love/hate relationship with the place that ultimately became so exhausting it started to wear away at my soul.

I agree with the "collection of insular social groups..." comment. I also think that it is a much more conservative place than believed to be, and that when people think of San Francisco, they are usually thinking of one or two or MAYBE three neighborhoods, not the majority of the city which is pretty dog eat dog and not all that glamorous or else made up vulgar wealth and all the ills that come with that whole thing.

Still, I always loved the ocean, the fog, the houses painted different and wonderful colors, cafes in North Beach and especially the murals. I miss the murals most of all. And fantastic huge cheap burritos.

I don't really ever miss the people.
[User Picture Icon]
From:chefxh
Date:March 10th, 2005 02:47 pm (UTC)

Re: Relatin'

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I developed the most extreme love/hate relationship with the place that ultimately became so exhausting it started to wear away at my soul.

Exactly. Well said.
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From:dominicvine
Date:March 10th, 2005 05:23 pm (UTC)

Re: Relatin'

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Ahhhh, Yeah
thanks guys.

i understand that well
there are so many things that are SICK about this town

when i slide upon the surface
it is SO beautiful

but i've never felt good putting down roots
or dealing with the society at large here

it's good to get feed-back agreeing with me...

but i also have friends here that love the city to peices and will not tolerate anything bad being said about it
(and i will withhold my judements about these peoples own state of being, but know: i have some)

it's a beautiful city from a distance
it's great for a visit
but i'll see you next at the places you've actually made home in...

From:(Anonymous)
Date:March 13th, 2005 05:16 am (UTC)

the mouth peice of GOD

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musicians and artist most of the time listen to God and they do not edit God!
but most people speak for GOD and don't hear him!
most people have Gifts from god and don't share them!
same goes for brain, talent, dreams,
but to the few that hear and lets God use them
is alway grace and a blessing somewhere!
A door may close, but a window opens.
our hands are the only hands god has to use !
so for everyone else there are few whales to eat you and them spit you out some place and fate is a game of chance !
there is much to be done and place to go and people to love even for a few moments ! let you music bring joy to someone , or move some one to a new plane of thought .......maybe closer to GOD ......and he likes good company!
One black classical organist in NYC in a kilt working on his journey to something good!

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