32
?
this time of meditation on myself
my actions
my thoughts and feelings
oh, have I?
I haven't even paid attention
I should look at it all now
Now
before that
I feel sick of myself
like my ego is useless
of course it's not
it is
in fact
less sick
in a wave
cycle
of entropy
more sick leading to death
later
now
just life
not depression
but
I want to not write about I
ok
but don't discount yourself
keep up the love
what does it feel like?
it feels good to feel
there is some pain and awkwardness
but mostly power and beauty
that's what it feels like
not bad
I was going to say
I don't like the choices I make
thus I gate myself
thus desire to negate myself
annihilate myself
but it's not the choices I make
it's my actions
yes
it's the choices I make
lost
out of control
where is this?
center
if I
could choose to come to center
with every breath
could I be at all?
my heart hurts here
.iP
