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June 11th, 2010

32.9 @ 02:35 am




so
fine
I left the house again today
coughing and sneezing on the subway
after a morning of wrestling myself into some lovely yoga
effective
pointedly not eating
putting on a string bikini
strong bitter tea

accomplishing things
walking down 6th ave and finding two cacti in the flower district
packed with mescaline (as far as I could tell) for $10 each:=$21.78
while I waited for the Russian lady to finish telling me why I can't
cat Damiana from her coz she only uses Artemisia for decoration (I
didn't bother forrecteing her, just pet her big loving grey Tom Cat
while she prattled on)
walked down 6th
deposited the check in their bank
a deep voice. big tall bear... tongue hanging out of my mouth
I followed him up to the door
went up to blue lotus
Danny wearing J's shirt looked more boring than I'd ever seen him...
there I go again hating those who love me
I wanted to make him skip school
I'm a bad daddy
She gave me pills
and I ran off
through the slight rain
cross Madison park to the casting call
some other music video
higher clout
as a executioner
we'll see...
very little to report on that
but really
it seemed as if it were set up for and by kids who it never occurred
to grow up
feeling old?
the imagination of kids makes fun stuff though
the imagination of adults... well...
(not to generalize)
for still being sick
I hope I looked alright

headed back over and down
now the weather warm and bright
I stopped in Tekserve and bought a USB game controller
$21.78
and continued down the block into Pong Sri to have a big bowl of Tom
Kha Gai (mmm coconut milk chicken soup)
exchanges with my friend from Amsterdam
I dropped off some mail at 200w21
and met up with M in BigD's on 14th
we sat in Union Square til it started to rain
he gave me Dutch candies
I let him play with my iPad
we walked through the pouring rain to get some hot chochlate (he got a
sugary crepe)
say and talked in sone tourist dive
gigantic people flanking us

it's my turn for love
he told me

he had to meet Inez
and I was losing ground

I made my way
standing
subway to subway
back home through the rush hour

exhausted exhausted exhausted
sweaty and tired
I rinsed off
lay down
my back on a pillow
opening my ribs
I passes out for what felt like an hour

then started eating chocolate covered sprouted almonds
and trying to figure out how to get my game controller to work
arranging my cactus
getting my new apps to function right
right
Right!
then played Super Mario for an hour
I Suck!
is it coz I'm old?
or sick and brain damaged?
I switched to SoulBlazer, which Dani introduced me to
and got lost in that for hours
how did that happen?
blink of an eye and it's 2am!
fuck
I should be sleeping
I should be dreaming
I should be more grateful
though I really am

yeah
the judgements of judgements
of course
what I am includes that
release
release
just be
it's time for this
make time for this
it's time...

.iP

 
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