June 18th, 2010



my velocity should be checked
I understand I've been in the docksfor a while
but zero 2 sixty
I'm over booked
kinda until the end of the month
and haven't scheduled any alone time for the next few days
so maybe this will have to be re-arranged
but I discovered the mystery of
just do it
oh, no, sorry. I thought about it.

went to see Hair
a guy who I was scared of in the past
don't really know
was still very distant from him this evening
only thought of
inappropriate questions
after we split for the evening

but I saw the show as if it were performance art
rather than money making broadway theater

it's probably both
but more of the latter
yet still some of the actors connected with me
more the ones who didn't have to be so melodramatic on stage

back ground singers are free to be more open channels
leads are tight nozzels
squeezing the spirit out in a specific spray

I watched them
like the dancers, performance artists, actors in the last several months
and thought:
I want to move my body like that
I want to do that with my body...

...does one revisit a psychic that gets many of the details wrong
yet is very positive
so it would be nice to believe?

I don't frequent them
it seems most are wrong about the details
but always say I'm something special
meant to be wealthy
and on the brink of an astounding change

which is nice to believe

"But when you want to Live
How do you Start?
Where do you Go?
Who do you need to Know?

I said to her on the phone
when she announced her perception and confusion of my mind like "but
you're not Scientific."
"yes, very rational, logical. but very balanced with your emotions,
creativity. sensually oriented. artistic. not very scientific, though
you could be"

yes, I said, I used to believe I could Know The Truth by studying the
world outside me
but it required many tools, cooperation and much uncertainty.
when I started studying art and yoga and psychadelics I realized I
could know the truth of the world from inside myself and found that
much more practical and useful

but more anti-social as well

do it in front of people
sing it out

will it mean more?

do it.