June 15th, 2007

blowing in the green

great ride down

i had a great ride down yesterday

i've been using craigslist for years for rideshares
and never before has it happened
where i got a big sexy gay daddy bear

maybe it's a sign of good luck?

i've never had a gay man before at all
nor have i had someone of my "type"

but when this man arrived to pick me up
i lusted after him the moment i saw him in his Subaru...

in fact
the day before
when he first called
the house was crammed with people
and when the phone rang
it cut through all the chatter and resonated in me somewhere
"it's for me"
and it was
and it was this guy who was giving me a ride down
and just talking with him made me feel warm and fuzzy
-- though i knew absolutely nothing about him
and he very little about me:

it was just a simple craigslist rideshare.

with all of my craigslist ride shares
i like to give them something more than just some money for cash

the first one i gave tons of MP3s to
dumping them on his hard drive when we arrived at his house
before he took me to his destination

the last one
i showed a nude swimming area on the way up to Arcata
and though it was late January
we still stripped naked and jumped in and played around

this man and i
when he arrived
he asked to use the bathroom as i was packing my stuff
he kinda reminded me of Shrek
but in a good way, ya know?
big jaw, big shoulders, big arms, big hands, big belly
no facial hair (hence the Shrek even more)
as i lead him to the toilet he asked me how i liked my stay in vermont
i told him about Rock River
he said he'd heard about it... which pools?
as i could feel my balls and second chakra humming
and struggling with wanting to wrap my arms arond him
i made it clear i had been going to the gay area where many people were having sex in the forest
"oh, i definitely need to go there then," he said

only ten minutes after being in the car
we cleared it all up
and i was massaging his neck

his huge, thick neck
and feeling all of the tension in my body draining

often, when i connect with people, i feel the energy coming to homeo-stasis
when i believed myself to be more limited
this made me scared i was being drained
now i love the feeling of that connection
and the lessening of the pressure inside of me
even just from touching like this

i closed my eyes and enjoyed the comfort as we rolled down the road
one hand on his neck
the other hand in his hand

so we were boy friends for the day

we stopped a few times and had sex on the way down

once at this place in new york that i'd stopped at a few times back and forth
a trail head
obvious for what it was
it was very hot
and with a stream right there
so easy to wash up afterwards...

and again
in a parking lot

he said "i've never done things like this before..."

-he'd just come out 5 years previous
he was nearly 50
and still in the divorce process with his wife

amazingly, we had lots of "cuddling"
as much as you can do in a car barreling down the freeway
stuck in traffic

took a little longer than we'd suspected
but it was a very nice ride

i arrived at my friend's house
to a home cooked meal
and a three-way
(with a big black man who i'd talked with for years on line and never met-- also a nudist and goes to GNI every year... maybe that's in my future too!)

i slept early
woke early
and feel grateful

of course
i checking my email
i heard from a guy i played with a few times a few years ago
a big bear
bi-sexual, you know
he always had a girl friend too

but now they're married
and get this (this is great)

in marriage counseling
(i don't get it: they got married just so he could share his health benefits with her... APPARENTLY)
she pulls out the most recent issue of the New York Press
which has an article about the Sex Worker's Visions show
with one of MY photos illustrating the article

and she says, to the counselor
"See! he's been going to whores! this is HIS BODY!"

she knew he was part queer
what's she complaining about
and that body is nothing like his body!
he's even chubbier!

i asked him
"did you tell her that NO, that wasn't you... but that you knew who i was?"

"oh no, of course not, no. she does not know we know eachother."