May 17th, 2005

cigarette kidd

esoteric life history

i was typing in things into google
un-known numbers in my phone
other numbers i knew in my head
names that had turned into myths...

i found this:

i nominate trevis hutsell, a friend that i have lost contact with, who made up The Distance Game. at a designated time, i stood on the Hawthorne Bridge, and he on the Morrison, and we waved red flags at each other so we could see each other over the distance. trevis, i havent seen you in years, but i always think of that whenever i cross the bridges. it makes me feel like no matter if i am near a person or far away, if i know where they are or not, if we cared about each other we could wave really big red flags and see each other.
Genevieve Dellinger
Wednesday, September 25, 2002 at 13:14:38 (PDT)

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    Location: New York- 79 Clinton

bridget had a dream about me

Bridget arrived back to the house the day after i did:
so much for time alone in the apartment here...

she left Phoenix, AZ at 11:30 at night
and flew
disappearing three hours in the time-change

while sleeping on the plane
she had a dream:

i was in the back seat of a car
it wasn't moving, no one else in it

the radio was on

you were talking about your recent success
the column you had in the magazine
how surprised you were that the gay magazine wanted to print your writing
-- you had been writing about sex you had had with two women
which might just be the same old boring
"gay man turned straight" story
but then you went on to talk about how that was just a precurser to the really amazing thing in your life:
your new lover
who is an F to M tranny
and he's blowing your mind and satisfying you in a way you've never been satisfied...

which is funny
because i've been thinking so much about heterosexual sex lately
and had the conversation [again] about wanting to know and F to M
and understand the path they walk
... sometime recently...
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    Location: New York- 79 Clinton

subway notes

my new phone has a special buttons to make voice-notes
-riding the subway a while ago
(5:03pm 4/7/05)
i took two notes
reminding me i wanted to write about this:

so many people on the subways sleep
nodding out
from exhaustion of the day's work?
or the lack of oxygen
in those deep tunnels
a million crammed in people
windows sealed, now
air conditioning

nodding off
are they dreaming?

i must read books
or do yoga, qi-gung
or photograph them...
think about them.

waiting is always an active process for me

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    Location: New York- 79 Clinton
blowing in the green

new port... Oregon?

who are you?
who posted a comment to my last entry
saying you had lost touch with me
and found me again
and now you're living in NewPort Oregon
restarting your business

give me more

send me an email
or comment to this
and leave your address

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    Location: New York- 79 Clinton