dominicvineoftheowls (dominicvine) wrote,

Hotel Nights

The Baymont
under construction
fucking room numbers laying on the floor in front of the door
walls stripped
carpet all fucked up
windows smudged
wainscotting falling off
new ceiling paint
perfuming the room.

he'd driven in from Atlanta
and quickly exposed himself as a compulsive liar
though he enjoyed it
and didn't do it maliciously
-- he did his best not to play tricks with me
but he never told me his real name

four hours of massage
and i'd finished the session
but there'd been some amazing stories
not to mention butt-licking and cock sucking going on there
-- he's a hot little guy (well, he's very big, actually: i'm a hot little guy)
and around 3am we ended up going to sleep
cuddling only a little
(we'd had plenty at that point)

he said he woke around 6
and caressed me for hours
which usually wakes me up
but didn't this morning

though when he started mouthing my dick through the sheet
we got going again..

he was fun
just a guy
with a nice dick
giving sensuality
and witty mind

"i want a man like that"
i thought
sizing him up for a husband

which i noticed i'd done the night before
this prisine man
who'd not been having sex with his life
but making music
dual citizen of here and england
"what a make" i thought
"we could get married and live in a little room in Bloomsbury"
or somewhere better

kissing him passionately
wrapping my body around him
he was adorably handsome when he was naked and horizontal on the bed in my arms
but didn't look as good under the flourecent light of the sink...

which was fine
because he didn't care how he looked
and why should it matter anyway?

why was i imagining him as some future lover?

i DID like being with him and DID find him sexy
but what's this husband shit?

i shake my head and drive on

i hate sleeping in hotels
but i've stayed in two since goat got back
no way i can stay with him
fragile boiling pot

and why is that?
why am i afraid of him?
and torturing him?

oh boy
our fucked up emotional bodies

this guy and that guy
the love and lust
hopes and failures

good time for a quote:
"you drift all your life
from ocean to ocean
-- search the whole world
but your drunken confessions
and hijacked affairs...
just make you more alone"

i dunno
i'm not going to judge it
i'm just noticing it
(as an act of self defense)

but it felt nice for a while.


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