"Maternal": a mother
what is the way a child feels towards his father?
i asked a massage client i was working on a few days ago
nice thick grey chest hair
a joy to touch in so many ways
and i asked him
whatever it was
i was feeling it towards him
he paused only a moment and said
which hit me at an odd angle
and i collapsed onto him and just lay there for a while
-- i've never felt loved by my father.
but as i worked on this client
i felt some of the healing that i need
and said to him, as we talked about sexual types,
"it's clear to me now that i do have this daddy type for a reason
-- i'm trying to heal my childhood.
i cannot stop having a type until i'm finished
and then i hope to be able to love everyone beyond my own needs..."
i asked a few other people
stopping with Nayland, the great encyclopedia
"Filial" of course
are filial duties
i'm familiar with that
but only begrudgingly
love has to go both ways
i certainly hope it does some day.