i don't know if i really slept that well
but i did notice that the sun was coming
and it would be pointless for me to try to sleep much longer

so sat up
looked out the window
shivered a bit from the cold
watched the colours wake up the land
the mountains
the sea

it was beautiful.

by the time the day was actually here
sun stopped hiding behind those hills
we pulled into a town called Alexandropolis

i got out
stretched

went to use the toilet

long line
they were only using the female
because the male squatter had a HUGE dump of shit left on it
someone missed the hole
and no one wanted to clean it up.

ugh.

Back on the bus
i saw two people had claimed the seat in front of me
bleary
i sat down on the back seat
slumped

i heard them talking...
they sounded scottish
hmm...

it wasn't long before the boy of the couple
turned and asked if i spoke english

yes yes

is this bus going to istanbul?

yes yes

oh, ok.

a long conversation started that lasted the rest of the ride:

the girl, my mother's name,
had lived in istanbul for five years
... it sounded like she hated the place
the boy had just been there a year
and they were newly living together

i assumed they were a couple

the girl was wasted
i guess she drank too much last night
and wasn't too communicative

but she spoke more turkish than the boy
which came in handy when we got to the border

we all had to hand in our passports
(which they had lost somewhere)
(then found)

we got off
waited
then all got back on

drove further
got off again
got all of our passports back
and had to stand in line

only to find that the girl and i needed to go Buy Visas...

which
oddly
could only be done in US dollars...

hmmm

it was only 20 bucks
no big deal
but strange..

the guy gave me change in dollars too

ah well

we got back on the bus
drove to the duty free
and had to spend time there
-- i spent the rest of my € on dolmathes and water

i tried to feed these two kids
hungover and bleary
they were both hesitant

but the boy warmed up quicker
ate some of my bread and cheese
the girl couldn't stomach any of it

the boy's name was David
and he was a very interesting fellow
we had good conversations

and when we had our first stop in Turkey
(what the hell was the name of that town?)

he walked around with me
looking for a bank

i ended up changing my money in a jewelry store
which he said generally gave better rates than banks

odd

we both had to use the loo too
he said it's always best to look for a mosque when you need a piss
coz there are always toilets around them:
the men have to wash their feet, hands and necks before each prayer

ok..

i used some of my new turkish money
some odd small amount
he didn't have any on him
so i paid for him too...

men washing in the next room..

yeah.

down by the bus
there were about 20 guys trying to sell shit to us
perfume
chocolate
shoes

hmmm

still tired
but now getting excited

and shocked
as we got closer to istanbul
... it goes on forever
in every direction

nice to travel along the water though..

and
fortunately for me
David and Karen knew a cheap way into town
(the taxi would have cost more than the bus from athens to here...)

there was a free shuttle to Beshiktash (wherever the fuck that was)
and they instrucked me to walk from there up to Taksim square
catch the underground there out to 4.Levent
then take a taxi from there to Akmarkez

they warned me
however
that most taxi drivers don't really know where they're going

which was the case with me..

i mean
he knew how to get me to Akmarkez
it's the biggest fanciest mall in Istanbul
but he had no idea where the residence was...

i just asked a cute kid
who was obviously humoured by my visage

he laughed
and pointed up the road

no problem..

however
the guy at the desk had no idea what i was talking about when i said Lewis had left a card and key for me in his box
What?
he called the flat
somebody answered ( i assumed a rainbow kid )
and told me to come up

so i did.


a nice glass elevator
one of the slowest i've ever fucking been on, though

up to floor 17

some kid dressed all in white with curly hair opened the door for me

there were four rainbows with dreds and rags all scurrying about
not looking me in the eyes
not happy

i told them i didn't want them leaving on my account
they playfully told me that was the only reason they were leaving

whatever

i put my bags down in the foyer
and looked around

this was a huge flat
large kitchen
huge front room with a balcony
gigantic picture windows looking over the whole city
and today
a sunny day now
everything gleaming..

the boy with the curly hair was in the kitchen
i sat at the table
and started rolling a spliff
thinking this would be a nice gift for Lewis

who still wasn't home yet

some turkish girl came up from the slow elevator
big fluffy hair
she wanted to roll one too

we three sat and talked
as the dRainbows scurried out of the house

this curly kid
his name is David
not like we'd say in america
but "Dah-Veed"
-- everyone thinks he's israeli, he tells me, but he's Spanish
they just say the name the same...

and i like this kid
i'm getting on well with him

just as i finish rolling the spliff
(the same type i rolled for Stelios: no tobacco and plenty of prayers)
Lewis arrived

but he said he didn't smoke anymore
but thank you
and would i like to come to dinner with him?

ugh
bleary
but OK

i was guided again
dressed in lewis's clothes
and out to his subaru

he kept saying "ducks on a pond, ducks on a pond"
and when we got in the car
a song saying the same came on: the incredible string band
i guess this CD had been on repeat for a few decades...

we dropped David off in the centre of town
and met up with a beautiful muscular friend of L's
got in a taxi
and went to his house
where is wealthy older lover lived

the older lover, Theo
was a bit freaked out by me
but all smiles
and maid
and red wine
i started to get sleepy very quickly

but we were putting off dinner
because L really wanted his friend Ram there

so we waited
appetizers
and wine
and cigarettes
and then Ram called
so L and the young one went off to find him

i sat and talked with Theo
struggling not to pass out
not just from exhaustion
but Theo took me around his house showing me all of the stuff on his walls and shelves
"Thees is vrom a VEhry VAMOUS man
and THEES is Vrom a Verhy Vamous man
thee most Vamous , you know... he is ..."
it fucking drove me nuts

i hate being around people who are constantly telling me how "Famous" someone that i've never heard of is

fortunately
L and A came back with Ram

Ram Chandra.
who's friends with Kwai, ya know
who's lived in India for quite a while
and used to kick it with Ram Das

what fucking luck
clarity and fire in his eyes
virgo boy

it was great
hanging out and chatting
Lewis was so excited to see us together
and his joy fueled ours
all talking talking
talking talking!
drinking
eating
a strange macaroni and cheese?

hm

but then we were off to a famous gay bar where madonna came when she was in Istanbul
oh great, yeah!

but we were lit and silly
we all danced liked mad
silly dancing
dancing hard
dancing fast!
it was fun
but the bar was boring
we kinda freaked every one out
which was nice and all
but we left after an hour
leaving Theo and his young beautiful friend there

we walked down a market street filled with people even at midnight
or one
or two
or whatever it was

we went to the Tek Yon
gay bar for working men and bears
dance club!

so many men dancing
we got drinks
and started dancing

which was fun
but there were many stories to be played out
Ram had unfinished business with someone
Lewis knew everyone
so i set out to cruise people..

some really hot guys

i saw some bear dancing with a girl
but he kept eying me
so i danced over to him
danced around him
he turned a looked at me
gave me a nod i couldn't really interpret

i thought he was beckoning me closer
but when i moved towards him
he reached out
and PUSHED me away
in such a way that Spun me around

wow...
i've never had that done to me before

it really made me feel terrible..

there was an incredibly cute bear doll dancing as well
but he refused eyecontact with me
however
his boy friend was quite turned on to me
yet spoke no english
and that was over quick

i went upstairs and sat against the wall
all my exhaustion collapsing upon me under the weight of my sadness and rejection

some guy sat down next to me and grabbed my hand and put it on his dick

that's nice...


i'd really fucking had enough

i let Lewis know
and said i'd meet him out side

i walked around
sulking and burning..

went back in
and got them

"you should have told us if you were feeling that bad"

i'd taken a nose drive
and hit hard on the cement
smashed to bits
was my cheery personality

we drove Ram home
went back to L's
and i looked in the room that was supposed to be mine
it was all messy with scattered shit and dRainbow energy
so i decided to put a mat in the front room and sleep out there

beautiful
alright.