a little tossing and turning
but not much, really
all things considered...
but when i woke
it was about 7am, i think
by the Peruvian clock
CA is three hours behind
which meant: about three hours left of the flight
it was all the shuffling around the plane..
had to pee
the soggy bread rolls with melted cheese and... "ham"?
i drank my AirBorne Effervescents
and tried to convince myself to sleep again
i knew it was futile
and got out the book to finish it.
my mind was full of holes
and here i was trying to bring the fullness of being into my presence
kinda skidding into home plate
kinda sliding under the door
it made me laugh
i'll read this over and over again..
the light in the sky was comming on
in front of us
but behind us
the sky was fire
buring through the black
... something about light?
the gay steward
and winking a lot
but not at us so much
but the two older men sitting in front of us
who had just come from the National Geographic boat in Antarctica
yeah, we're fucking pussies
he was 84..
"it's better Together" the boy said
and we were stuck in our seats
long lines to piss
the lights flickering on
it was time to go
6:30 or something
had to wait a moment
we were there
it all went so simply
.. you know that little voice that always tells you
"you're gonna die"
every time you do anything?
he's always really surprised when the plane lands
but usually he keeps his mouth shut at that vital moment
coz he doesn't want to hear
"i told you so" again.
(not like the continent, more like the God Given Right)
shuffling through the immigration lines
-- the guy hardly looked at me when he checked me in
... but i was staring at him
his big black round face, big hands, wide belly
and the shaved head, pale skin, dark stache over there...
Jim walked passed him
making a face at me, saying " i think i left my papers in the seat pocket on the plane "
... they took him off somewhere
and i went to get a trolley for the luggage
got the luggage..
where is Jim?
(slight paranoia about the ayahuasca and san pedro in my bags)
Oh, there he is...
over to the..
Of Course ( i fucking say , under my breath )
the guy writes a big Red A on my card... then does it to Jim's too... coz he can see we're together
we go over to the line
which is pretty non existant
and they ask us the questions
and as i'm putting my bags on the conveyor
"and some plants i brought From here... medicinal herbs, you know, from here..."
has his aura on full
a power that only the Mature really have of
"""THIS IS ALL FUCKING BULLSHIT: DON'T WASTE MY TIME"""
and the guy doesn't really inspect
i doubt he even looks at the monitor
before our bags are through
he's telling us to collect them
and we just wheel them out..
past the kid who's exasperated
as his entire suitcase is being taken to pieces
which the big man lacsidasically saying "you know, i can show you where it says i'm allowed to..."
and the kid is saying "yes yes..." while his body is squirming like the pee-pee dance
Jim hasn't called Gene
and his mumbling about the fucking inane bullshit inspectors
burbles into a story about when he came back from Africa
and Gene Was Right There, waiting for him
(but he wasn't Now)
we turn the corner and start walking the ramp
and there's Gene
Looking almost fatherly
a composed and loving large grin on his face..
i meant to have the camera out for this
... somewhere in my mind
but i was so burnt out...
they hugged and kissed
and Gene immediately tells us he was very good
and didn't let him self get into that emotinal space..
he almost lost it with the one email i sent
telling him that Jim talked about him all the time..
right out to the car
right into the traffic
right into the LA Jams
right into 90MPH weaving between cars
cussing out each of them
i checked my voice mail
-- damn, my voice sounded sleepy and blown out on that message...
i changed it (how does it sound now?)
and we got into Palm Springs about 2.5hrs after we left the airport
i thought i was going to go to sleep
but decided to copy all the pictures first
and that reunited me with my Love
(well, my computer)
and i sat at it the whole day
moving pictures around
THINKING about finishing all my journal posting
(coz what i haven't posted already i have hand-written in the little black book i've had in my pocket...
except this entry, which i'm writing from memory days later)
and trying to line up massages and bellies and the next few weeks
go to LA on thursday
go to SF on saturday
to go Harbin on Tuesday
Fort Bragg on Thursday
back to SF on Tuesday (maybe hermitage/harbin again?)
i don't know
i can't make plans
and don't really solidify anything
but there are many people who want massages
though that guy here in PS flaked out already
i'm back in california
and won't be back in NYC til the 15th
and is it possible i'll get a ride upstate?
but it's fine
i say i'm going to bed by 10
but it's 10:30 by the time i peel myself off the keyboard
and make it to the teddy-bear room
knocking the bears off the bed
stacking the pillows elsewhere
turning back the covers
and settling in for a well-deserved Rest.